One Effective Way To Deal With Toxic Family Members

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We all have at least one – a toxic family member. But, how do we deal with family members that are just plain difficult to get along with? Do we write them off? Do you simply ignore them? That would be the easy way. I believe there is one effective way and it will revolutionize your family relationships.  

The most effective way to deal with toxic family members is to pray for them. If you are having a difficult time interacting and relating to toxic family members, spend time genuinely praying the following prayer or a similar one you create.

Prayer for the Toxic You

Lord, I recognize that it takes two to create a toxic relationship. I know that __________ is not solely the reason for the relational toxicity. Father, I recognize I have relational blindspots. So, please show me how I have contributed to the toxic family relationship with my words and actions. I confess my selfishness, bitterness, unforgiveness, pride and anger. I repent of my part in creating the chasm in the relationship between ___________ and me. Wash me with your word and create in me a clean heart.

Prayer for a Toxic Family Member

Father, I struggle in my relationship with _____________.  You know I have a hard time liking and loving ______________. Please give me the desire and the will to love ___________ well. I need your wisdom and strength.

Father, being around ______________ is just plain awkward. I don’t really know what to do about it. So, Father, I need your specific directions on how to genuinely interact with ______________.

I desire to love ______________, not just in words, but in deeds and from a pure heart and a clear conscience. Therefore, Father, fill me with genuine and courageous love for ______________, the same kind of love you have for me.

Father, because you have forgiven me, you have given me the capacity to forgive ______________ for wounding me deeply.  Therefore, by faith in Jesus, I release ______________ from owing me a debt that only you can pay. I realize that forgiving _____________ is immediate, but reconciling with ___________ will take time.

Jesus. I surrender my emotions of anger, bitterness, fear, and indifference. Please forgive me for holding a bitter grudge against ______________ and treating __________ like the enemy. I allowed Satan to put a wedge between ____________ and me. Forgive me for sinning against you and ____________. I am sorry, Lord.

So, today, in the name of Jesus and by the power of the Spirit, I pray for ____________. I ask that you would bless ____________ and meet all __________’s needs. I ask that you would remove fear, shame and guilt from _____________’s life and bring complete healing to _____________ and my relationship. May the same power that raised Jesus from the dead, transform my relationship with ______________.

In the name of Jesus I pray, Amen.

Whereas _____________ might feel like the enemy,  he/she is not. The real enemy is Satan. Remember, we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but principalities. Satan’s ultimate desire is to destroy your relationship with ___________ and he will make ___________ seem like the enemy. Don’t believe the lie. Submit yourself to God. Resist the devil and he will flee from you.


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